What Did I Learn From a Purse Snatcher? #Frustration
On Monday night while driving home from work, I received the call you NEVER want to receive from your spouse. Kristen called me with a scared, panicked voice like I have never heard from her before. She shared with me that we had been robbed. Someone had walked into our garage, rummaged through our cabinets, touched our stuff, and walked away with 2 sets of golf clubs and my wife’s pursue and wallet.
We called the cops and within minutes they responded and helped us talk through next steps. They will do what they can and will help us track down this thief. We know we won’t ever see the golf clubs, the $85 cash in her wallet or her credit cards ever again. On the flip side, she’s safe, my kids are safe, and it’s only stuff. A little inconvenience, a few bank fees and a handful of phone calls and replaced cards. Not a big deal.
Only it’s a huge deal.
I’m pissed. Someone walked into my home, rummaged through my wife’s car and STOLE from us. I am not handling things well. Yeah, yeah, yeah… I know it could be worse and yes, I’m glad everyone is safe, and I know’s only stuff, but it’s a pain in my tail. I. Am. Frustrated.
The problem for me, however, is that I just learned that frustration is a sin. Jerry Bridges, in the book Respectable Sins, says frustration involves the act of being upset or even angry at whatever or whoever is blocking our plans. The problem in frustration is that we act as though God were not involved in our lives or circumstances. Instead of thinking about God, I focus entirely on the immediate cause of my frustration. When I am frustrated I live an ungodly life, living as if God doesn’t exist or matter.
In essence, I act as if Psalm 139:16 is not true. Psalm 139:16 says, “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Bridges writes,
"“days ordained for me” refers not only to the length of my life but to all the events and circumstances of each day of my life. This is a tremendously encouraging and comforting thought. So when something happens that tends to frustrate me, I actually quote Psalm 139:16 to myself and then say to God, “This circumstance is part of Your plan for my life today. Help me to respond in faith and in a God-honoring way to Your providential will. And then please give me wisdom to know how to address the situation that tends to cause the frustration.”"
If only I responded to the robbery in this way! Rather, I fumed and moped, shut down my wife and kids, and later that night, in a juvenile temper tantrum, threw everything on my desk except for my computer into a big pile on the ground. This included many books, stacks of papers, bills and cash. I acted like a big old baby.
What Could Have Been?
What if instead of shutting down my family and pitching a hissy fit I actually asked God what He wanted me to learn in the midst of this challenging situation? What if my first response to my frustration was to pray for my wife and kids and my second response was to pray for the thief? What if I thanked God that we don't have to steal to make ends meet or to fuel an addiction?
Incidentally, we have reason to believe that the thief was a father and son. I am grieved to think of the way this father is ‘discipling' his son. The possibility that a father partners with his son in robbing people makes me want to pray even more for the thieves that stole Kristen’s purse.
I believe this is the third post I wrote in the past few weeks based on what I am learning in the book Respectable Sins. This book is flat-out kicking my butt. We often think behaviors such as anxiety and frustration are not really sin. Yet, whatever is not like Jesus is sin. I am thankful for opportunities to become more like Jesus. The next time something frustrating happens to me, I sure hope my response will be better than it was this time around. By God’s grace, by His Word, His Spirit and His people, it will be.
Last thought: since whatever I read in this books seems to come true and give me fresh examples in real life, I hope the next chapter is about what to do when you come across a lot of money or what to do when someone drops off a new car in your driveway. I'd like the opportunity to respond to that!
Thanks for joining me today. I hope what you read on my site encourages you. I am grateful for a place to share what God is teaching me. I hope He uses my lessons learned the hard way to spur you on towards love and good deeds. If you would like these posts to come directly to your inbox instead of having to come across them in your Facebook, Twitter or Instagram feed, go ahead and sign up for my blog in the box below. Until next time...
Your Turn:
How do you respond when things don't go your way? Do you get easily frustrated or do you look at life through a Psalm 139:16 lens?