Are You Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired?
I know this is supposed to be a marriage blog, but sometimes/often I like to stray to other topics where the Lord is working in my life. As any of you who have been reading my blog know, my battle with food and eating is the biggest struggle in my life. It’s the problem that won’t go away and often/daily/hourly rears its ugly head and seeks to devour me (pun intended).
I have blogged about it, fasted for it and preached on it, yet this continues to be the thorn in my flesh and the toughest battle in my life. While the topic does not relate directly to marriage, the battle is 100% connected to my marriage. As with most of life, we cannot quarantine an issue to one area of our lives and think it won't affect our marriage, kids, and community.
I know we all have our own struggles. For some its porn, for others anger, and for others it's body image issues. Feel free to insert one of many other addictions, habits, or sin struggles. These struggles exhaust us and take an enormous amount of effort to experience victory. I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired in my battle with food.
I have tasted victory many times in my battle with food and exercise, only to fall back on old patterns and struggle even more than I ever have before. By God’s grace, today I am doing well, but this comes on the heels of almost one year of failure and defeat. A great friend of mine is helping me right now find victory through weekly coaching meetings. Each week he helps me think through victories, defeats, and strategies for future improvement.
Today I want to share a few things I have learned from him. While these lessons apply specifically to struggles with food and eating, the lessons learned and principles apply to any sin struggle or addiction.
1. Look for 1% improvement every day.
I have tried all of the fad diets and the latest exercise programs. They all work for a short period of time until I fail, quit and/or return to my old patterns and the old numbers on the scale. Instead of making dramatic, large improvements, today I look to make small improvements every day. I know I’ll be more likely to continue to change if I make small changes instead of large dramatic shifts.
Here is an example: Let’s say I want to get stronger. I start by doing 10 pushups one day, 11 push ups the next day, etc...
What is a 1% improvement you can make today?
Read this article from The Art of Manliness called Get 1% Better Every Day.
2. Planned responses to temptation.
I know when I am stressed I turn to food. When I experience victory I turn to food. And, when I am tired I turn to food. Instead of automatically turning to food in each of those circumstances, I have a set response I turn to. For instance, when I am at my house and I am bored, instead of turning to food, I throw my headphones in and go for a short walk or go shoot some hoops. When I am tired, I take a nap (If I’m able), or I knock out two minutes of exercise. The best thing I can do is turn to God’s Word and respond to temptations with Scripture.
How about for you? When you are tempted to give in to your sin struggle, what is a planned response you can turn to in the midst of temptation?
Do you pray when temptation strikes? What verses can you memorize and recite to yourself when the temptation comes?
3. Do something every day, even if for only 10 minutes.
Sometimes I think exercise is only worth it if I get at least 30 minutes in (which also usually includes driving to and from the gym, a shower afterwards to clean up, etc…). Some days I am able to get a longer workout in, but other days I just need to get whatever I can. A short walk is better than nothing. A quick bike ride is better than just sitting on the couch.
What is it for you? What’s the short win you can get when you’re not able to go all in for a longer period of time?
4. No eating after 7:45pm.
First of all, this requires I plan ahead. Second, it puts some good parameters in my life so I don’t eat too late at night, which is especially helpful so I don’t give in to late night snack cravings. It takes the decision making away. Should I have an apple? Or Apple Pie? Or Apple Pie with Ice Cream? No, no, and no. Game, set, match.
What is it for you? What’s the rule you need to make to best help set you up for success? What can you do to help you plan ahead so you’re not just winging it?
5. Accountability in eating.
I am supposed to text my friend and let him know what I plan on eating for both lunch and dinner. And, when I get there and order my meal I need to send him a text with a picture of my meal so I can confirm I did what I said I was going to do. This forces me to plan ahead and make good decisions instead of just winging it whenever I get to the restaurant. It forces me to make better choices on where I’m going to eat and provides some great accountability that I do what I say I am going to do.
This also provides me with some great community. It’s always better to walk through challenges with friends or family who will help you in your struggles/battles.
I am sick and tired of being sick and tired, but it's been a good week. How about you?
Your Turn:
1. What’s your sin struggle that you battle that just won’t go away? What area of life are you sick and tired of being sick and tired?
2. Do you have some community around you who can help you in moments of temptation and struggle?
3. What can you to help you plan in advance? For example, if you struggle with pornography, what are some proactive strategies you can put in place to help you avoid times of temptation?